From My Heart To This Pen, With Love
by nojudgementjustlove
Summary: One shot! or maybe a series of one shot letters, poetry, voice mails, telepathic conversations, any form of communication between Spencer and Toby...
1. Always Coming Back To You

_**So yeah, I'm weird and I'm always writing some sort of weird poetry. And since I bored at school, thought that I'd write a one shot poetry (even though my teacher is eyeing me suspiciously). Please don't laugh! **_

_**Always Coming Back to You**_

_(To Toby)_

_Love_

_Passion _

_Warmth_

These words are the epitome of you

You searched my banished, dark heart

And released me from the night

You saved me from myself, I cried

There was beauty in your eyes…..

_(To Spencer)_

My caged heart was locked away

Under a brittle block of insecurities

Squelched by the rust and the dust of lies

….You found me….

When I thought that all was lost

And I was destined to be failed

You took my hand

And took my heart

And almost instantly I was safe….

(Together)

I searched for love in distance places

But I found none that could compare to you

I searched the deepest, darkest allies

Somehow, I'm always coming back to you…

(_Together we'll find our destiny _

_Tomorrow we'll fight anew_

_And even thought we may find ourselves part_

_I promise, I'll be coming back to you…._)


	2. A Shadow Is Birth From Light

**A Shadow Is Birthed From Light**

_It's always darkest before the dawn_

Whispering heartaches in the characoly dark night, the voices in her head became loud and wild. A lone window hanging high seemed to usher in an unpresidented feel of further doom, as it denied its purpose, bringing no light. It was a reminder of her life.

She listened as the sound of her heart seemed to magnify a thousand. The soft fleshy valves that laid beneath her chest working vigorously, opening and closing for the entrance and hindrance of her blood flow. It created a "thump thump" rhythm in her ear, so she allowed it to send her to death without the commitment- sleep. She sought a form of refuge in it. Maybe this was where her peace hid.

Deep in the subconscious realm of her unprotected mind, her dreams silkingly flowed. Dreaming a dream of those blue eyes that sent shivers down her spine, and how just one look from those soulful windows was enough to electrically charge the chemical makeup of the room, altering it with exuding love.

She yearned to taste his lips again…

To feel safe within the haven of his arms…..

To be his again…

But darkness had descended and taken it victory over light. And as she was jolted back to consciousness by this painful reminder, she was face to face with the nothingness of the room again. The aching void that ruled her life since he left.

He had gone to serve his country. It was a selfless sacrifice.

It was also the most difficult thing she had ever experienced- the not hearing from him, the worrying, the constant feeling of needing to empty her stomach's contents- it bundle together with the fear- the possibility that she might never see him again.

She had thought that not being able to breathe was the scariest thing.

Not breathing _**everyday **_was harder.

She had yet to exhale.

She willed the hands on the clock to hasten its movement.

Hoping that the morning would conquer and chase the emptiness away. (Darkness scurries in light's presence)

So as time moved at its own leisure, she watched the wall until finally dancing shadows appeared there. Knowing that a shadow owed its work to light, she smiled.

She took this sign as foreshadow for brighter things….

And as though the world heard her thoughts, the first beam of sunlight streamed through the curtain.

The sun began its ascension, and a new day was birthed, he stood in the entrance of the door, partially obscured by the sun's soft rays, which illuminated his figure giving off an angelic appearance.

Was this a construct of her mind? Was she really seeing him?

Her heart ceased its functioning completely, and then to compensate for its misdirection, it began to gallop against the confines of her chest.

He saw her perplexity and stepped further into the room, his smile growing in size

And as though, her body had a body of its own, she sprung up straight into his waiting arms, grabbing onto him, as though letting go would somehow change this reality.

With her legs wrapped around him, high in his arms ,she smelt his hair, she touched his skin, and pulling back so her face was to his, she saw his eyes.

Those azure eyes that had been the subject of her dreams. That had helped her maintain her sanity.

She tightened her grasp once more around, denying the space that was unoccupied between them. She allowed every suppressed emotion to be released, as she cried a cry of relief onto his broad shoulders.

Letting out the breath that had so weighed her down, she allowed the emotions to encapsulate her "Your home"

"I'm home" he smiled, hugging his wife with every figment of strength in his body.

He kissed her hair and she snuggled further into him. "Please don't let me go" she pleaded "Don't ever let me go"

As assurance, he pulled her in even tighter.

Outside the day had conquered.

#sleep deprived writing #i write when I can't sleep #the ending is bad # can't really do anything beyond angst #fluff is not my thing #morning equal happiness #happiness equals toby

#toby in the army

#i'm so weird #please forgive me # I write a lot of angst #fluff I can't do # story of my life


End file.
